Do you still have that face etched in your memory? Every detail, every curve, even the curve of their smile and the warmth it made you feel in your chest is still fresh in your memory?
You don’t have the pictures with you anymore but honestly you don’t even need them because those moments are still fresh in your mind and heart. It’s so fresh that you can describe all the tiny details too and the listener can feel themselves in that moment with you.
Actually, you know what not just the smile but those shining eyes, the way they looked at you and only you. Like they never had them for anyone else. The way their cheeks turned red when people used to tease them by your name. The way those lips just called your name, felt honey to your eyes, a name that was just meant for you. The shoulders that were there for you to lean on always, your constant support.
Yes, things didn’t work out the way you both wished for but you never lost the respect you had for each other. It’s still there and both of you are not the villains of each other’s story, the time is.
They still walk into your memory with that smile and those glittery eyes looking at you, might even be seeing through your soul and ready to give you that shoulder again to lean on and support you. But you can’t, just can’t accept them again as you have moved on. But you can’t also let the memory go, as they were your sliver of sunlight through all of your darkest days that kept you going. That made you believe that yes things would get better if they are by your side.
Even though you have moved on in your life, sometimes you like to visit those memories in your heart, visit that person because they help keep you sane even till this day during all the chaos life is.
These people are the ones who are called ONCE IN A LIFETIME people. The things they have made you feel you cannot ever again feel the same way in anyone ever, the warmth they made you feel stays even after it has been years without them, they are still there with you and will always be till the time to prefer to hold onto them.
The above piece is a part of my work in progress novel.
Please do leave your feedback in the comments when you read this.
I was driving through the heavy rains when I saw him crossing the road. I just couldn’t believe my eyes, turned around and tried looking at him again till I was sure it was him, it was Ahaan only. I followed him with my eyes till as far as I could since I was waiting for the signal to turn green. This couldn’t be really right, he died years ago in a car accident. My mind was going crazy at the thought of him coming back from the dead. As the signal turned green I found the nearest parking spot and parked my car. Pulled out an umbrella from my bag and got down to follow Ahaan. I had to confirm if I had mistaken someone else for him.
As I started running towards the direction I saw him go, I was receiving weird glances from the passersby. My expressions would have given away my feeling of dread. Ignoring it all, I just ran towards the narrow street I saw him entering. He was visiting a library, Solitude Library, the board outside read. I went inside too. Putting my umbrella aside I looked at my reflection in the entry door and took a few deep breaths to calm myself. I couldn’t find him inside, not at least in the distances my eyes could cover standing at the reception.
“Hi ma’am, how can I help you? “, the receptionist asked. It startled me of course but I couldn’t let it come on my face.
“Hi, so I just saw the board outside and couldn’t stop myself from checking out this place. I love reading. Could you please help me know more about your library?
Happy to see a potential customer in me she started explaining everything to me. From the book borrowing options to sit in the library and enjoy your book in silence with tea, I knew it all. When she told me If I would like to take a round of the place to decide before joining the membership program I immediately nodded. Yes I loved books but I couldn’t get distracted from the reason I came here.
I had to fill the entry register before entering the main premises. I checked the names above mine and saw Ahaan’s name there, a chill ran through my spine. How could it be possible that this man who has been dead for the last two years is now suddenly back from the dead and visiting a library? I wrote the time quickly and went in.
Pc- pinterest
I could smell his cinnamon and musk perfume and I was sure this was his because he used to get this fragrance personalized. While I was faking checking out the books collection my eyes were searching for him only. He surely wasn’t on the floor I was so I climbed up the stairs to the second floor. As I turned right, I saw him, the same as before. Not even a single thing had changed. He was still that tall, dark and handsome guy with the smile that could brighten my day and make me feel wanted to be held in those safe arms. The one I had loved with all of my existence. But God hadn’t blessed our relationship the way we had thought. While he was coming to meet me one day his car was hit by an over speeding truck and he died on spot.
But I could see him perfectly fine sitting and reading there at the table. I went straight to him and patted him on his back. When he turned around and saw me his face had turned pale like he had seen a ghost. With tears waiting to open the flood gates in my eyes all I could say was I missed you. Looking at his expressions it was clear he was as shocked as I was at seeing him. He held my arm and guided me towards the side of the shelves. I was waiting for him to say that he also missed me but what I heard him say made me go numb. “How the hell are you here? You were dead. I made sure of it” , he said, tightening his grip on my arm. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. “Why would I die? I’m here alive. It was you who died in that car accident two years ago. When I saw you today I couldn’t believe my eyes that you were alive and I have been living as your widow”, I somehow said it all in one go. He laughed menacingly, I had never seen this side of his. He looked at me with that look in his eyes and said.” So this is the bullshit that they have feeded you with and not revealed what I did. I didn’t die love, you did because I wanted you dead. But I can see some part of you is still here so let me finish it all once and forever.”
He was choking me with every ounce of power he had. I was fighting for my life at that moment wishing I wouldn’t have followed him here. I was breathing heavily with his hand on my throat and kicking him with all the little bit of force left in me. He wasn’t letting me go. I knew I would be dead soon.
I heard Ahaan say baby tea is ready and I couldn’t understand anything. It all was so confusing, maybe I was hallucinating in my last moments about some food memories. I felt myself fall with a thud and woke up finding that I had fallen asleep while reading a recent thriller and Ahaan was right there, alive with tea in his hands for both of us. I was still breathing heavily.
Hooked with Books 