Book- If I Could Remember

Author- Vedant Saxena

Neil Gaiman in his book ‘Coraline’ said:

 “Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be defeated.”  

We talk about monsters similarly. We glorify this idea in weak minds that monsters can be defeated. It’s an illusion, to assure us nothing is impossible. No. Sometimes these monsters live among us. Breathe with us. Eat with us. Sleep with us. They never leave us alone and remain undefeated, unconquered, feeding on us, living on us; like parasites.


We read many books but there are some gems that make their way through our heart and make us think, think about things that aren’t mostly even talked about like mental illness, rape, molestation etc.   I’m not someone who usually reads thriller but when I read the blurb of this book I couldn’t stop myself. There’s something about the author’s words, about his writing that made me feel this book to a totally different level. Just after I finished reading the prologue, I couldn’t make myself read more soon not because I didn’t like it but because the pain that I felt, each and every word that was there on the paper gave me goosebumps, shook me from inside and made me cry too. I felt like I was there, in the scene seeing someone being raped. When I say I felt the pain, I don’t mean that I felt the pain of a rape victim, no, no one can. The pain that a rape victim goes through and not just the pain everything a rape victim goes through I can’t even put it into words, my words would never be able to do justice. I knew the moment I started reading this book that it would leave me devastated but I wanted to read it. According to the NCRB report, a woman is raped every 16 minutes in India.

As I read each and every chapter, I was left with a lot of question not just about the story but our society too. The major question that popped up in my head was- is there anyone who feels fully safe and secured and not living in a constant fear that one doesn’t know what might happen the next moment just because you are a woman.

I liked the writing style of the book. The story kept me hooked till the end. The author has successfully managed to talk about various dark segments like raped and molestation. I read about how the author had to get into the dark segments and actually feel it all himself first before bringing it to paper, I really appreciate him for that, that is not something that everyone can do. The character development was good, I had faces of characters in my mind the whole time I was reading.  For me this book was a masterpiece. There are some quotes at the beginning of every chapter which made me think, wonder and a lot more things and most of all those quotes felt apt for each and every chapter. I cried, felt hurt and pained, got a lot of food for my thoughts and also felt disgusted about some aspects of our so called society that we live in. The ending left me shocked, that wasn’t something that I was expecting but I guess that’s the art of this book.

I was finally able to put words to my feeling about this book, just hope that I was able to justice to it.



Rating: 4 out of 5.

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